Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
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