so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
is wine microwaveable?
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
Randomize
