i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
Randomize
