Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
50% drunk capacity currently
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
