I don't usually arrange sex via text message
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
Mom said you looked used
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
Randomize
