I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
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