I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Randomize
