Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
he had hair everywhere except his balls
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
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