weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
Randomize
