Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
