my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
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