fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
