i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
Randomize
