nut hugger
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
