What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Randomize
