the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
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