How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize
