I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
