she kept yelling 'call me bella'
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
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