i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
jump out the window naked night went bad
Randomize