like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
