I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
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