please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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