I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
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