My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Randomize
