Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
Randomize
