ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
