And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
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