Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Randomize
