He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
