I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
Randomize
