Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
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