I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
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