We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
