You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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