It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
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