Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
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