I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Randomize
