At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
Randomize
