First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
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