Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize
