WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
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