oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
