How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Randomize
