at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Randomize
