dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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