Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
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