Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
she peed on how many people?
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I want a musical about memes.
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