I want to have your abortion
one two three fourrrrnication!
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
