College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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